Tuesday, February 24, 2009


I accidentally posted that last one. But I'm gonna leave it because its funny. Anyway, I'm in the library and seriously, someone keeps kickin em out. Its sick. It smells so bad. I want to leave, but then I feel like people will think its me. Because why would the innocent leave? So if I have to sit here and endure this, I figure I'll write some more of my 25 (8357) things. Here you gooooo...

1. I am a fan of guys that wear hats. I think every guy looks 100 times better in a hat. Unless the hat is made out of duct tape. And the guy is riding a unicycle. That guy was in my Spanish class. True story. 

2. I hate the sight of mayonnaise. I don't necessarily hate the taste of it. But if I see it, I have to wipe it off. Like at Wendys, they always put so much on the Jr Bacon Cheeseburger. It's gross. And it makes me mad because it adds a whole step (wiping off the mayonnaise) to eating my JBC. It should not be that hard to enjoy food.

3. I cry a lot and I like it. Mostly I'll cry for no reason. I don't really seem like the type but I definitely love to cry. I'll cry after talking to someone on the phone or when I hear a song. This might sound sad...but it's not. Crying makes me feel good. And its never like out of control. Usually just a few tears. Very cleansing. Highly recommended. 

4. I've always wanted to fill the back of a truck with pillows and blankets and drive out to the middle of nowhere and just hang out under the stars! Or under the sky...doesn't have to be at night. Why in a truck? You don't have to load/unload crap. And you are off the ground. You wont get attacked by snakes or have fire ants in your underwear. Win/Win.

5. I laugh by myself a lot. I can just be sitting in class or in my room and I'll remember a funny moment and start laughing. I'm pretty funny. And usually once I start laughing I can't stop. Which is great. Especially in church or at funerals. 

Ok thats it for now. I have to get back to work! 

who farted?

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

I Drop Things.

Yesterday I was picking up my computer. Apparently, my fingers are tiny slip n slides. Somehow I ended up just tossing my computer across the room! This is not the first thing I've dropped...
My phone, my keys, a curling iron (while in my hair), knives, a vacuum down stairs, etc. 

I started thinking about my future as a mom. I will not be able to carry my child without freaking out a little bit. If I can't hold on to small things, how will I handle carrying A HUMAN?? 

My kid better come with a helmet. 

Monday, February 9, 2009

some more things...

1. I'm pretty sure vaseline cures cancer. I'm convinced it's the reason I don't have forehead wrinkles. It is my number 1 beauty secret. Needless to say, I do not have many beauty secrets.

2. I blow on my ice cream, but never fail to burn my tongue on hot food.

3. I am ridiculously competitive. When I set my mind to winning, I HAVE to win. Even when I play games in class...or even at church I make people hate me. I yell when they mess up. I call them names and tell them they're stupid...which is for their own good! If you let people get away with stupidity they'll never learn!! Oh, maybe I'm not competitive. Maybe I'm just mean. 

4. I use wikipedia as the main source for most of my work. Sometimes I look up journals and other things and I cite them in my projects/papers, but mostly all the information I actually LEARN is thanks to wikipedia. It's just so easy to understand. And so accessible!

5. I regularly pee my pants. Usually not a full-on pee. I just have very little control when I laugh a lot. Once when Kelsey and I were playing dress up I peed while standing in my closet. Like 2 feet away from the toilet. I was just laughing too hard. She had to hand me the toilet paper to wipe off my leg. I wasn't wearing pants. 

6. Sometimes my friends and I talk with speech impediments. Lisps, etc. Sometimes we break out the retard voices. Once at Wal Mart I ran through the parking lot yelling and acting retarded. We decided that next social situation someone will pretend to be retarded and then come out as normal at the end of hte night. Whoever is chosen to be the retard will wear a helmet. For this, I am sure I'll be blessed with a retarded child of my very own someday. PS everyone should watch the MTV show Hows Your News? It's my new favorite show.

7. I NEVER iron my clothes. I wear them wrinkled or throw them in the dryer if they're realy bad. Mostly I just wear them wrinkled though. I'm not that interested in impressing anyone to the point where my clothes have to be perfectly straight every single day of my life. If someone has an issue with that, they can suck it.

8. I joke A LOT. I'm sarcastic A LOT. Some people can't handle it. And sometimes when I meet new people I think I lay it on a little thick. Too much too soon, if you know what I mean. It scares them. I'll work on it.

9. When I drove for the first time, I had a pretty embarrassing experience. I didn't really understand the logistics of driving. So when I made my first turn, I didn't let go of the steering wheel to let my wheels straighten out. Nope. I kept right on turning and ended up on a center divided on top of a juniper bush. My car got stuck. We had to walk like 2 blocks to my moms friends house to call my dad to come tow me off. When I got home I locked myself in the bathroom and cried. I could hear my older brothers laughing so hard outside. I swore I'd never drive again. But somehow my mom forced me back into the car. And now, happy ending, I am an excellent driver. But my brothers and dad still bring it up every chance they get. 

10. My two least favorite parts of the day are #1 getting out of bed. I need to get a less comfortable bed...it's the only thing I can think of that will make it easier. and #2 I hate getting ready for bed. Like the whole taking out the contacts, changing clothes, brushing teeth, washing face. It is so annoying! Sometimes I just want to go to bed in my jeans and let my contacts stick to my eyes and make me blind.
Everything in between those two moments usually goes pretty smoothly. 

Ok Now...Ok Now I...have two fingers.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009


more things about me. 

1. When I was young I played a lot of sports I hated. Like basketball. I like watching it. I love going to games. But every time my coach put me in I would have a slight heart attack. I didn't know what the crap I was doing! I was tall so I felt obligated. And all my friends played, so I did. Oh, and soccer. Man, I hated soccer. And I hated my coach too. Well not really my coach, but his son was a huge douche. And to top it off, I was scared of the ball. I was way more likely to get hit in the face by a basketball or softball, but for some reason the soccer ball always scared me. The first sport I really liked was tennis. The team was so fun! And we were all so lazy. We would lie about how much we ran in our conditioning class so the coach would make us do less laps. And we would mess around so much...especially if we got the back courts. It's a great sport. Everyone should play tennis.

2. Speaking of being scared of soccer balls...when I was in like 9th grade my brother and I were playing basketball at my house and he passed me the ball when I wasn't paying attention and it smacked me in the face. Which has nothing to do with soccer balls. But it does have to do with getting hit in the face. It wasn't too bad...except that my lips got stuck in my stupid braces. haha braces. good times. I had skin and blood all up in my grill. It was bad. 

3. I'm obsessed with popping my elbows. I punch out my arms and they just pop. It hurts if I don't do it. And it looks crazy when I do. So it's just bad all around. 

4. I secretly really like Utah. When I was driving home after freshman year at BYU I actually broke down and cried. It was a combination of saying goodbye to everyone for the summer...and the boys all leaving on missions. And seeing the mountains getting further away and smaller off in the distance. The summers and springs and falls here are amazing. And the snow is beautiful...not my favorite to be out in. But its the best snow on earth! It says so on the license plates! And most importantly, there are so many hot guys here. 

5. I have a volume disorder. When I get excited I start yelling. And then I'l look around and see that everyone is staring at me. or if I'm on the phone, I talk really loud. It's weird because I always make fun of my brother and dad for talking loud...but I guess I do it too. Also, my hand motions can get a little out of control. I'm a danger to myself and others. 

Sunday, February 1, 2009

47 Thangs.

You know those posts on facebook...the 25 things posts? I am so annoyed by them. But somehow i always end up reading them. 
Today I decided to compile my own list of 25 facts about moi. Thats french.
Too bad I could not stop at 25. I made a list of 47!! hahaha man I love myself way too much. But I wont throw all 47 at you at once. I'll make this process long and drawn out and very very painful. I'm thinking 5 at a time. By the end, you'll just be dying to know those last few facts about me. 
Plus every single one of my facts is like a page long. I like to write a lot. Especially on my favorite subject: myself. 
And dont worry, I wont post this on facebook. I cant have EVERYONE knowing EVERYTHING about me. This is only for an exclusive group of people. AKA anyone who happens to read my blog. AKA no one. 

Here are the first 5. TA DAAA...

1. I am not clean by any means. Which is weird because I really love clean things. I love a clean house. Like when everything is dusted and the baseboards are shining white. I like it when the windows are so clean you cant tell if theyre open or closed. I want to just run into that clean glass! Sometimes when my house or room are clean all I want to do is just stay home and sit in the cleanliness of it all. I would turn down a night out just to enjoy my clean house.

2. I can spend like 3 hours in Ikea, but I rarely buy anything there. I actually kind of hate everything in that store. The furniture is all crap and its really small. Its made for like tiny European apartments. It's pretty much the worst store ever. And once you get in, it is so hard to get out! They make it a maze to trap you in there. But then the delicious meatballs and cinnamon rolls at the end that are laced with something that makes you forget how bad the experience was. And they also are laced with a slow-release drug that makes you crave another trip to Ikea the next week.

3. Once I took a bite out of a jellyfish that was on the beach. It was on a dare. I did not get anything for doing it. It kind of melted in my mouth. Like cotton candy. Made out of salt.

4. It is my dream to do a triathlon. Unfortunately I can barely walk to the bathroom without losing my breath. 

5. I love road trips. It gives you a legit excuse to eat fast food all day and not change out of your sweatpants. But when it comes to traveling I prefer airplanes. I love flying. I love hanging out at the airport and seeing all the people. I love to see who I'll sit next to on the plane. I love falling asleep in the lap of the old man next to me. I like how it feels to take off and FLY in a huge metal contraption. The fact that a huge metal thing full of people has the ability to fly is amazing! And boats!! dont even get me started.

There we go.

Spring. Its upon us.
Actually, its only February 1st. UGH. Why is winter FOREVER LONG!?!! 
But these past few days have felt positively spring-like. 
So for now, my blog will be springy and flowery in hopes of bringing on an early warm season here in Utah.